By Jeff Moss
DetroitSportsRag@GMail.com
March 18, 2015

Last week the Detroit News successfully forced 39-year employee Tom Gage into retirement with a reported buyout package after stripping the Hall of Famer of his gig on the Tigers beat.

In what seemed to be a metaphorical parting shot regarding his departure, Gage’s final article was about the dwindling number of local bowling alleys.

At the time, the DSR speculated that the next shoe to drop would be Terry Foster, who was pressed into taking the Pistons beat after Vincent Goodwill took his snake oil act to the Windy City. 

Foster’s Pistons duties at the News have seriously infringed on his ability to spew his special brand of idiocy on the 97.1 airwaves so it was only a matter of time before Foster would have to make a decision about where to “devote” himself professionally.

And it appears that decision has been made. Sources have informed this websight™ (The Five-Tool Imbecile himself) that Foster is leaving the paper after the Pistons season mercifully concludes next month.

We have not been able to confirm that Foster’s departure will be accompanied by a buyout package but that would only make sense.

While Foster is not a member of the paper’s union — he crossed the picket line years ago during the strike — it is believed that he was still being protected by the local guild anyway, hence his continued employment despite offering absolutely nothing of value to the News.

The recent power play management pulled put Foster in a precarious position as there was no way he could both cover a beat AND regularly appear with Mike Valenti on their #1-rated talk show.

It was a master stroke by managing editor Gary Miles — although you don’t need to be either Kasparov or Fischer to checkmate Foster.

If the rumors are true and Foster is on the verge of taking a 50% pay cut, you can only imagine what Ralph Kramden business scheme T-Fos will come up with next. The East Side is on notice (especially the local gastro physicians).

Now we anxiously await Foster’s final article. I am hoping it’s a human interest story about “Ewe” Krupp’s involvement in “Gorilla Warfare” over “chimpmunks” taking over “websights.”