By Jeff Moss
June 13, 2011
DetroitSportsRag@gmail.com
This has been the day I have been ruing since I decided to bring the DSR back from the dead™ (Zombie Jew Christ.)
The day where I really have nothing to say, but felt compelled to write an article anyway to provide fresh content for the DSR.
I have been advised that people are going to expect new material every couple of days so my goal is to write two to three columns a week and add an occasional Podcast to the mix if anyone is crazy enough to sit down with me and a digital recorder.
And in the last month it has been fairly easy to bang out a few columns a week. This shit has almost written itself.
But for the last couple of days I have been staring at a blank Microsoft Word screen with nothing interesting to write about.
I mean, I guess I could have broken the story about Channel 7’s Don Shane placing his house on the market because he is retiring from WXYZ. But I didn’t think anyone would really care about this “Breaking News” not to mention this IS a sports site.
I pondered penning a column about Ndamukong Suh’s no-show at the Lions’ player led workout this week.
How Suh’s has been selfish this offseason and how he hasn’t displayed the traits of a true leader. From his asinine participation in a European road rally to his failure to attend either of the Lions’ voluntary workouts.
But then Suh showed up on the last day of camp (for his own self-serving purposes) and then I remembered that my favorite Detroit Lions player of all-time used to fall asleep on the bench when the defense was on the field so that angle kind of lost some steam as well.
I was thinking about writing a blog post regarding Emaciated Adolf’s continued insistence on playing Ryan Raburn even though the piece of human excrement is hitting .200 with a .235 ON-BASE PERCENTAGE and a horrific OPS of .559.
Even if Raburn were the defensive cross of Bill Mazeroski and Bid McPhee, he would be a liability in the lineup. Why Jim Leyland continues to run this guy out there every night is beyond me.
(Of course, this is also a man who constantly ignores a warning label with a Skull and Crossbone on it so there is evidence he isn’t exactly the sharpest tool in the shed.)
On Thursday night alone, Raburn weakly popped out to first, struck out with a runner on third and nobody out and grounded into a double play.
Or as I like to call it, Raburn pulled off a Gerald Laird hat trick.
But before I could pull the trigger on a 1,500-word column dedicated solely to Raburn and Cancer Stck’s insistence on playing him, Leyland decided to sit RaBUM for a couple of games.
The Pistons coaching search seemed like fruitful territory for an article until I realized that I really don’t a flying fuck who the Pistons hire to be their next head coach.
At that point I was getting fairly desperate for a topic and momentarily thought about writing a vicious diatribe against Grand Rapids Free Press columnist David Mayo for his abortion of a column titled, “Dave Dombrowski, Jim Leyland deserve credit as Detroit Tigers hang in AL Central race.”
The attack piece obviously would have been highlighted by Mayo’s felony conviction for growing marijuana, but then I remembered that I strongly believe weed should be legalized.
(Although I do find it absolutely hilarious that Mayo entered into a 12-step program for addiction to MARIJUANA. I mean, are you fucking kidding me with that? That is almost as ridiculous as comedian Richard Lewis entering AA for an addition to CHAMPAGNE. Seriously, when Mayo attends a meeting and stands up and announces, “My name is David and I am addicted to marijuana”, do the other addicts bust out laughing?)
Look, this website is dedicated to Detroit sports. The four professional teams are my wheelhouse.
I attended (liberal use of the term) Eastern Michigan so I really couldn’t care less about the in-state jihad between Michigan and Michigan State. Not to mention I am not very literate on college athletics and unlike most columnists in this town, I understand my weaknesses.
There are about 45,000 websites these days dedicated to athletics so who gives a shit what I think about LeBron James or the NFL lockout? You can get that analysis ANYWHERE.
On this site you will mainly get my opinion on the Wings, Tigers, Pistons and Lions.
And some days the pickings are going to be slim. This is one of those days.
The Tigers Financial Woes
Thanks to the Cleveland Indians recent 1-9 stretch, the Tigers crept into a virtual dead-heat for first place over the weekend.
Wow. First place in the AL Central on June 13th. Pretty good, huh?
Well, I don’t want to rain on your parade, but there are some ominous signs out there that should make you feel uneasy.
For one, the White Sox are only 3 ½ games behind the Tigers. Could you imagine how close they would be if Adam Dunn actually had a hit against a lefty this year?
And as absolutely horrid as the Twins have played all season, they are only 9 games back, which would make me nervous if this were September 1st and not June 13th.
But there is something even more alarming than keeping the White Sox and Twins within sniffing distance while those two teams have struggled mightily in the first couple of months of this season.
You see, for some reason there has been this conventional wisdom that if the Tigers are in contention at the trade deadline, the team will do something to add offensive punch to their lineup.
There has been speculation that Dave Dombrowski might be interested in upgrading at second or third base.
Some rumors have even involved a trade with the New York Madoffs for Jose Reyes or David Wright.
Now, under NORMAL circumstances I am not sure why ANYONE would bank on this organization making a major trade deadline move.
Based on what?
Adding Sean Casey in 2006? That was a real earth-shaking move. Well, maybe when he was running the bases it was.
Or how about in 2009 when the Tigers acquired Aubrey Huff and Jerrod Washburn?
Those “huge” deals made the difference. For the Twins.
Since that 2006 season, the Tigers have been in contention at the All-Star break in every season except 2008 and Dombrowski has yet to make a HUGE acquisition.
So in 2011 we are expected to believe that the Tigers are going to make some big splash and add a big bat to the lineup?
Ok, pull this leg, it plays “Jingle Bells”.
You REALLY think a team that is outside the guidelines for MLB’s debt compliance (meaning their debt is ten times their annual revenue) is about to acquire David Wright to replace Brandon Inge?????
Especially considering that the Tigers are on the hook for Inge’s $5.75 million NEXT YEAR thanks to Dombrowski’s infinite brilliance. And maybe you think that the team’s failure to cooperate with Bud Selig’s debt compliance is overblown and not significant.
And maybe you even believe that the reports that the Tigers have lost upwards of $75 million over the last three years are untrue.
But how do you explain the team’s recent draft selections?
A team that in the past has gone way over Selig’s slot recommendations for talent (Rick Porcello, Jacob Turner and Nick Castellanos) like they were Darren McCarty at a casino with his girlfriend’s credit card all of the sudden decided to take a conservative approach?
In the past you couldn’t get really worked up by the Tigers acquisition of free-agents in the offseason in exchange for their high draft selections because the team would then overspend for players with “signability” issues.
Well, instead of sticking with that approach, the Tigers decided to spend their first pick (and 76th overall) on a catcher with very little upside.
Instead of reaching for a player they would have to overpay the Tigers decided to draft a CATCHER who Baseball America rated as the 129th best player available.
But did the Detroit media raise the issue of this sudden change in draft strategy? Of course not.
Instead the Tigers’ beat writers focused their in-depth draft reporting on the fact that the Tigers selected Al Kaline’s grandkid and Rod Allen and Mario Impemba’s sons.
Seriously, I wish I had a dollar for every article I read about Allen and Impemba’s children getting selected.
Two guys who have less a chance of making the major leagues than Texas Rangers draftee Jonathan Taylor. A kid who is PARALYZED.
So add it all up. A team that has been losing money like a kosher delicatessen in Tehran.
An organization that is so far in debt that they aren’t in compliance with MLB’s own rules.
And a franchise that just did a complete 180 on their draft strategy and selected cheaper talent or relatives of their broadcasting team. (I guess we should be grateful that John Keating has daughters.)
If you think this team is going to be a buyer at the trade deadline and replace Ryan Raburn or Brandon Inge, I’ve got a bunch of Brett Impemba autograph baseball cards to sell you.