Anthony Fenech Cannot Write Either, I Said

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By Jeff Moss
DetroitSportsRag@GMail.com
September 21, 2016

Detroit Free Press readers have had a nice respite recently as competent journalist George Sipple has been covering the Tigers for the paper more frequently down the stretch while derelict, hipster, douche bag Anthony Fenech has been on a European vacation and who knows where else.

And what often gets lost in the morass of Fenech’s abhorrent treatment towards women, his checkered past with drunk driving and his penchant for banging supervisors at his place of employment is the reality of how bad he is at his ACTUAL job.

Writing.

And last night’s “gamer” was a perfect example of how atrocious Fenech is at being an actual “journalist.” This drivel that came out of Fenech’s laptop would be hilarious if it weren’t so sad that a once great newspaper has resorted to promoting this punk on the cheap.

Just check out this dope’s lede:

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He is, and always will be, the Detroit Tigers’ best player. 

Oh. Ok. So when Miggy is retired, will he still be their best player? In 2023, when Cabrera is earning 32 million dollars at the age of 40, do you still think he will be their best player? For fuck’s sake, there is a decent argument to be made that before J.D. Martinez got injured in Kansas City earlier this season Miggy wasn’t even the best player on the team THIS YEAR.

There are THREE players on this CURRENT roster who possess a higher WAR than Cabrera this season (Justin Verlander, Michael Fulmer and Ian Kinsler).

Keep in mind that this was the opening to a summary of last night’s game.

But things actually got worse from there ….

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Yes, a man who supposedly covers the Detroit Tigers for a living actually wrote, “he is considered an exceptional baserunner …”

Who the fuck considers Miguel Cabrera an “exceptional baserunner”????? If only there were a way to quantify the physical act of base running. Hmmmm. If only there were a statistic to confirm Fenech’s supposition.

Oh, right. There is. It’s called “BsR” and it’s a stat brought to you by the good folks at Fangraphs …

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So, what is Cabrera’s BsR this season?

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Yep. MINUS 8.6.

-8.6.

Hmmm. If there only were a legend that Fangraphs could provide so we could put that -8.6 in perspective. I mean, in the game of golf, it’s really good to be -8.6 …….

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Oh, fuck. The chart stops with -6 as being AWFUL. So I guess we are just going to have to just extrapolate that -8.6 is REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, awful.

But wait, there is more ….

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“… took second base a feet in front of the throw.”

Nice. English.

Maybe if Fenech spent more time working on his craft and less time Tweeting out SELFIES and his fantasy football transactions like he did yesterday ….

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Oh, who am I kidding? This dumb fuck is a lost cause.

One can only hope that one of the two rumors I have heard are true ….

1] Fenech’s supervisors — those he hasn’t stuck his dick in — aren’t happy with his work this year. Or with the fact that he has overslept work assignments. And a change might be in the works this offseason.

2] Fenech supposedly has drawn interest from the West Coast for a baseball gig there. Obviously that potential employer doesn’t have access to Google ….

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It sure didn’t take long for this moron to validate his status as the Worst Detroit Sports Media Personality per our September rankings from last week.

Selfies and fantasy football trades.

Ya gotta believe me.

(You can follow the writer of this piece on Twitter @JeffMossDSR. Also, you can join in on the discussion of this article on Facebook by clicking here.)